There's so much to do, sometimes I wonder if I'll get through it all. Not that I'm preoccupied about making it - rather I'm concerned that, with this intense level of details, I won't know it all. It doesn't matter that I remember the lectures - I have to be prepared to recall a plethora of, at times, seemingly random bits of data. Sure, there has to be balance (between classes, not in life - are you kiddin?), but at the same time, grades are a numbers game. The lion's share of my focus always goes into the next big grade. Usually, that's a mini-exam, for which I have to study most things fairly equally. As is the case with lab practicals, though, I have to focus in on a few subjects. This time, I'm spreading my time between anatomy, neuroscience, and histology. I don't think the histo exam will be that bad - I just stare at it, and it makes sense. Now, I love anatomy, but I've heard that this particular exam is an absolute beast, so that's been getting extra time. Neurosci I love, but I havent' been giving it as much attention as I should have - especially since the practical is cumulative.
The fact of the matter is, though, that there isn't a whole lot of time to study - we get out of class around 3-4 most days, and and then the rest of the day is left going over old info, going over info from that day, and then the practicals (which are next Friday, by the way - so I have little more than a week). Just after that, though, the Shelves are going arrive, and then, we'll have mini 3, where will be tested the other information I've been complaining about.
There just doesn't seem to be any rhyme or reason to much of it. I know that, when I get to clinicals and even residency, those hours will make my current situation look like a walk in the park. However, it'll all be a bit more unified. I won't be running around like a chicken with my head cut off, trying to learn population genetics, which bony structures drain into which nasal meatus, and the exact cellular make-up of the eye, while trying to figure out the tracts of the limbic system, and what a histological slide of the gallbladder (no submucosa) looks like. I could be wrong, but I expect there to be an absolutely intense level of detail - I also expect it to be in the same ballpark, where the details will hopefully means something to each other.
I'm just complaining - I'm tired. Things seem to just suck up my time. Yesterday, we had a clinical applications quiz, worth possible extra credit, for physiology (male and female reproduction, fertilization and pregnancy, parturition and lactation, etc). The professor has this way of writing questions in such a way as to obscure what he's asking. It's almost like he takes some pleasure in obscurity, in confusing a whole bunch of second semesters. I look at things this way: I can accept getting questions wrong if I didn't know the information, or didn't remember it. That shows me that I have to study harder, and where I should focus my time. If, however, because of the way some professor wrote a questions - if, due to the random placement of words and arrows and boxes and positive or negative signs - I can't figure it, then that professor should re-write the damn question. No students should have to ask "exactly what do you mean who you put together this collage of symbols?" Give me a break. I don't like my grades depending on the fact that someone doesn't know how to write a question. That kind of thing pisses me off.
Today, though, the sucker of my time is going to be a charitable effort - I'm going to go and pretend to be sick so I can be interviewed by 3rd semester students. For one, I'll get to see the whole process, on which I will be graded in a few short months. Also, the director of behavioral science says he'll "note my participation" when he goes to write a letter of recommendation for me (and the 100 other students who volunteered).
In a perfect world, it wouldn't be storming outside right now (almost with the fury of a Texas thunderstorm). In a perfect world, I'd have class everyday until noon, spend the rest of the day studying with perhaps a quick break for the gym, and rarely be so tired I can't focus. When you get down to it, though, no one said it'd be easy, and I guess I oughta just suck it up. It's going to be a fight, and I'll be damned if I'm going to let them win.
On another and completely unrelated note, even though I have very, very fond memories of ours spent watching TV and playing video games in my room, I don't think I want my kids to have TVs in their rooms. As folks now think, TV might cause Autism.
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